


Not Always as They Appear

by sharkie335



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Doesn't Care, Clint has a vulva, Clint's dildo is purple and sparkly, M/M, Talk about a strap on, Trans!Clint, WinterHawk Bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 10:09:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28741533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharkie335/pseuds/sharkie335
Summary: Bucky finally got up the guts to kiss Clint.  But now Clint has something Bucky needs to know.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton
Comments: 8
Kudos: 85
Collections: Winterhawk Bingo Round Two





	Not Always as They Appear

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Poisontaster for yelling at me about feelings.

Bucky was _certain_ that he was reading the signals right. Clint sure seemed into him - leaning in to talk directly into Bucky's ear when it wasn't necessary, licking his lips while scanning Bucky's body, pouring him a cup of coffee without Bucky even asking, something not even Natasha got early in the morning.

The moment seemed perfect. They were together on a roof where they'd been placed in case snipers were needed, where they'd watched together as those with flight and those on the ground had taken out all of the Doombots without either of them able to do more than get a few shots in. They were leaning on the ledge, watching Steve and Tony talk to the press when Bucky turned to make some sort of smart ass comment, only to find that Clint was staring right at his lips.

He couldn't take it anymore, and he leaned in, pressed a soft, close-mouthed kiss to Clint's lips, and for long seconds, Clint returned it. There was no question that he was actively participating in the kiss, Bucky was sure of it. Then he ran the tip of his tongue along Clint's bottom lip, and Clint jerked away like he'd been burned.

There was a long, awkward silence, Bucky not sure what to say. He finally opened his mouth to apologize, only to have Clint hold up his hand. "Not here," he said. "Not now. I'll explain later, but I need a few beers first."

Bucky wanted to insist on knowing what was going on, but while he was an asshole, he was not _that_ kind of asshole, so he didn't push. Holding up his own hands, he said, "Hey, no problem. If you're not into it, it's fine."

"Not that I'm not into it," Clint grumbled. "It's - " and Tony came in for a landing right next to the two of them, and Bucky would have cheerfully thrown him off the roof, but they had a job to do, so he put on his big boy pants to go do it.

Later that night, he snagged a six pack out of the fridge he shared with Steve, and walked down the flight of stairs to Clint's apartment. He knocked on the door, and when Clint answered, he didn't say anything. He just held up the six pack in a question.

Clint gave a long sigh, but nodded and opened the door wider so that Bucky could come in. He went straight to the couch, which Clint detoured past the kitchen to grab the bottle opener.

The distance he put between them on the couch didn't give Bucky the warm fuzzies. He was more used to Clint sitting only inches away, not the other end of the couch. "Let me - " Clint said, opening one of the bottles and shotgunning it, drinking so fast that Bucky wasn't sure how he was even able to get it all down. 

He slammed that bottle on the table and grabbed a second. This one he opened but just took a few sips from it while staring at the wall instead of looking at Bucky. "I, uh, I - if this goes any further than a kiss, you're going to get a hell of a surprise when you get my pants off," he said. Bucky could tell that Clint was trying to go for casual. He could also tell it was anything but.

"What, you got tentacles or something?" Bucky asked, trying to make Clint laugh and lighten the mood.

"Depending on just how gay you are, you might wish that's what I have. No, um, when I was a kid, my name was Frannie."

It took Bucky a minute to put it together. "You mean you're a wo-"

Clint shook his head hard. "No, I'm a man. I just don't got the right parts. SHIELD offered to get me the surgery, but, well, the timing was never right, and then I was in a relationship with Phil, who didn't care, and then I figured I'd just live with it."

It was Bucky's turn to grab a beer and open it, but he didn't drink from it, just turning it around and around in his hands. He knew Clint probably expected him to be confused about women in men's clothes - or, well, men with the wrong parts, as Clint had put it. That part he remembered vaguely from before the war. He did have to admit that he was impressed that he'd never even started to clue in, and he'd really been _looking_ at Clint. Course, he hadn't had a clue that he should have been looking for _that_.

Clint was started to get a pinched look on his face, so he he realized he'd better come up with something to say pretty fast, "I know things have changed a lot from when I was a kid, but we had wo - people who dressed as the opposite sex then, too. Lived that way, as much as they could. But I don't really - do you _want_ to have a relationship with me? Because I'm not quite sure what to say, and whether I say anything at all depends on what you want." He wasn't really sure what he wanted Clint to say. It would certainly be less complicated if Clint just wanted to stay friends, but the idea made him a little sick to his stomach. He wanted to spend more time kissing Clint. Like, a _lot_ more.

Clint was peeling the label off his beer bottle. "If I wasn't interested, you would have never gotten close enough to kiss me. I'm pretty careful about who I let get that close to me. I would appreciate it if you don't tell anyone, though. Steve and Natasha know, and Tony probably hacked my files before offering to let me move in, but the rest of the team doesn't know, and it's none of their business."

"Hey, your business is your business," Bucky said without hesitation. "But, well, do you want something platonic or something? I don't even know the right words or anything, much less how to have a relationship with a man with the wrong bits."

"Term is transgender or transman," Clint said with a small smile. "That's the easy part. I'm lucky - I don't really have any real feelings around the fact that I have a cunt and not a dick. I was worse when I had tits, and SHIELD helped me with those years ago."

Bucky took a sip of his beer, and then another, trying to line up his thoughts. "Still doesn't tell me what you want." Bucky took a deep breath and made sure that Clint knew he wouldn't kick up a fuss either way, even though, wrong bits or not, he wanted to touch Clint so badly he burned with it. "If you just want a friend, you should know you've got that, and you didn't need to tell me about your bits for it." He leaned in, just a little closer, trying to keep his body open and telegraph _I'm willing_ as hard as he could. "So... what now?"

Clint sighed but there was a distinct level of humor to it. "We're going to talk in circles all night, aren't we? Yes, I like sex. Yes, I want to have sex with _you_." Clint met his eyes directly - no escape possible, or wanted. His hands twitched like he wanted to touch Bucky, but couldn't, not yet. "No, I don't like having a dick in my cunt, but you can fuck my ass, or between my thighs, or I can peg you if you prefer to be fucked."

Bucky couldn't help perking up at the unfamiliar word. "What's pegging?"

Now Clint's grin was wide and open. "You know what a strap on is?"

"Can't say I do," Bucky answered. "But if you want to show me, I'm all yours."

"Show and tell - one of my favorite games sometimes." Clint set down his beer and stood up. "Wait here for a second."

"Sure." While Clint wandered off in the direction of the bedroom, Bucky took another few sips of his beer, rolling the idea around in his head. He knew his way around a cunt - in the before, he'd had a bit of experience with them. But that wasn't what attracted him to Clint. 

Clint was laughter and sarcasm and bad coffee. Clint was aim that actually managed to be better than Bucky's. Clint was killer arms and a charming smile and someone who stopped to pet every dog on the way to the coffee shop. And while he would like a dick, he could live without one. But he didn't want to live without Clint in his life, whether as someone he had sex with or someone he just watched a game with.

Bucky had drunk about half his beer when Clint reappeared, black strips of... something in one hand and a dildo in the other. It was purple. And sparkly. And _big_. Bucky felt like his eyes were spinning in his head. "I'm not quite sure about the straps, but um, hell, yes, to that dildo. That looks amazing. I haven't been able to find anything hardly that nice."

Clint laughed, and it was a beautiful sound. "The straps are so I can wear the dildo and fuck you. And I'm glad you like the look of my dick - give it a feel and see if you still like it."

Bucky reached out, and the material was something he didn't think he'd ever felt. He'd expected rubber, but this was softer and smoother, with a solid core that he could just imagine inside himself. "What the hell is this thing made of?" he asked.

"Silicone. Great thing for toys and lube, but not together - they act weird when you combine them. I've got other cocks, but that's my favorite. But if you want me to fuck you, you should know I'm _damn_ good at it. Pretty sure I could make you scream with this one."

"Of course that's your favorite," Bucky said, giving Clint a sly wink. "It's purple. And hell, yes, I want you to fuck me with that thing. Now?"

"What kind of boy do you take me for?" Clint asked, holding his hand to his chest and blinking his eyes exaggeratedly. "I'm not that easy."

"I brought you beer," Bucky said, letting his voice get a little wheedling. 

"Thanks for reminding me," Clint picked his beer up off the coffee table and took another big sip. "How about we just kiss for a while and see what comes up?"

The low grade arousal that Bucky was already feeling just from watching Clint fucking fondle the damn dildo was enough to make him a little more forthright than normal. He ran his hand down his own chest to his cock, which was certainly as interested as the rest of him. He made sure to press down, so that Clint could see that he was hard. "Well, I know at least one thing that's coming up," he said, laughing a little.

"Why no one sees that you're a bigger doofus than me, I'll never know," Clint said. He set down the beer, straps, and dildo on the coffee table and then came to stand in front of Bucky. Then, without warning, he was kneeling, straddling Bucky's thighs, his hands coming up to tangle in Bucky's hair. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this," he said.

Clint mouthed at the upper edge of Bucky's ear, and then gave a sharp nip. Bucky couldn't help the sharp little gasp that he gave. "Probably 'bout as long as I've been wanting to do this," he said, resting his hands on Clint's lower back and slowly sliding them down, over the curve of his ass, and pulling him in tight.

With Clint in his lap like this, so close, it was impossible not to notice that there wasn't a bulge where Bucky's brain said there should be one. But thinking about it with the few remaining brain cells he had that were still active, he realized that it didn't matter. It didn't matter, not when Clint's mouth was turning Bucky's brain to mush. They could make it work, however Clint wanted.

He turned his head and caught Clint's mouth in a deep kiss, tasting the beer that Clint had been drinking and the flavor underneath that he could rapidly become addicted to. He tried to stay aware of what he was doing, making sure that Clint seemed okay with everywhere that Bucky was touching him, but if the way that Clint was leaning into his hands meant anything, it seemed like Clint was enjoying it all. And Bucky sure as hell was. Clint was hard muscle and heat and smelled _amazing_ and even if they never went further than this he was going to have jerkoff material for _years_.

Hesitantly, he pulled Clint's shirt free of his jeans and slid his hands underneath, up Clint's back. He could feel the heavy layers of muscles and the occasional scar, and when he scratched lightly, Clint gasped in a way that went straight to Bucky's cock. 

Suddenly, Clint wrenched his mouth away from Bucky's. He swore, long and low, and then one hand went to the neck of his t-shirt and yanked it off. He leaned back, his eyes focused somewhere over Bucky's shoulder, and Bucky realized it was because Clint was worried about his reaction to the scars that he could see, now that he was looking for them.

Bucky pulled his hands around to Clint's stomach, and slowly ran them up over his chest. "Gorgeous," he said, meaning it. Yeah, there were small scars, which Bucky assumed had to do with Clint having his tits removed, but if he hadn't known about that, he would have assumed they had something to do with Clint's work or his life before that. 

"Scars aren't too ugly?" Clint asked, and it broke Bucky's heart to hear how uncertain Clint was.

Bucky had no idea what the right answer was here, so he just leaned forward and pressed a kiss to one of his nipples. "All I see is you," he finally said. "And I like it."

"Oh, Jesus," Clint said. "Okay, we need to have sex, like right now. I promise to introduce you to the strap on later, but that'll take too long right now. So what do you want?"

"You, naked in a bed," Bucky said with no hesitation. "We can figure it out from there."

"I can do that," Clint said, already sliding backwards and getting to his feet. "Just - don't try to play with my cunt, okay? I'm okay with having it, but I don't like having it touched by other people unless I tell them to."

"You got it," Bucky said. "You call the shots, Clint. I'll follow your lead."

Clint paused and took a deep breath. Then he turned to face Bucky and said, "I don't know what I did to luck out, but I'm glad I did."

"Hey, if you got lucky, then I got twice as lucky, because I'm about to have sex with you, and who in their right mind would turn that down?"

Clint opened his mouth, and then shut it again without saying anything. Instead, he grabbed Bucky by the hand and pulled him to his feet. He didn't stop pulling, leading Bucky to his bedroom that had an unmade king-sized bed. 

Bucky laughed a little, trying to break some of the rising tension. "Purple sheets, Clint? Taking a theme a little far, aren't you?"

"Aw, shut it," Clint grumbled. "I _like_ purple."

"The whole world knows this about you," Bucky said, but then Clint started to unbuckle his pants and Bucky's mouth went dry. 

"You know, this would feel less awkward if both of us were undressing," Clint said, which sparked Bucky into yanking off his own shirt, and undoing his pants at the same time that he toed off his shoes. Within a few moments he was naked, looking at a gloriously naked Clint, and Bucky paused. He carefully kept his line of sight above Clint's waist and just opened his arms to wrap them around Clint, pulling him in tight.

Their lips met, and the kiss was just as hot, just as fervent as it had been a few minutes earlier, but now he was pressed against miles of naked skin. Clint was actually a little taller than Bucky was, and almost as muscled, and combined it made Bucky feel... safe. He wanted to make Clint feel just as safe.

"Bed," Clint murmured against his mouth. "There was something about a bed."

"Yeah," Bucky agreed, but he didn't start moving until Clint gave him a little push. Then he backed up until the bed hit him in the back of his thighs, and he sat down. 

Now that he was level with it, the lack of a penis was a little more distracting, but all he had to do was look up to see Clint's face, and once again it stopped mattering so much. "So, no strap on right now," he said. "What do you want instead?"

"You ever fuck between someone's thighs before?" Clint asked.

Bucky had, a couple of times, with girls worried about going too fast, or boys who didn't want to get caught. The thought of that, of the friction and the heat - he grabbed his cock by the base, cinching it tight while his breath caught in his chest.

At Bucky's nod, Clint looked a little relieved. "I really like that, especially if you go really high, cuz, uh... well, I like to come too, and I do still have a clit. You fucking like that will get me off without you having to touch."

"That what you want?" Bucky asked. At Clint's nod, Bucky said, "Then that's what we'll do. Work better with you face up or down?"

"Face up. Then I can kiss you while you get off," Clint said, and Jesus Christ, it pushed him even further, afraid he was going to come without being touched. 

"You're going to have to - " He hadn't finished the statement before Clint was on the bed, reaching for the nightstand and pulling out a tube of KY.

Handing the tube to Bucky, Clint rolled on to his back. Bucky shifted so he was kneeling astride Clint's thighs and smeared a handful of lube over his cock. Then a thought hit and he paused. "Uh... do I need a rubber?"

"Why would you need a condom?" Clint asked, then smacked himself in the face before Bucky could answer. "No, I can't get pregnant. All the inside parts are gone. Years ago. Now, don't you want to come? 'Cause God knows, I do."

Reassured, Bucky leaned forward, letting his cock nudge up against and then between Clint's closely clenched thighs. Between the lube and his own foreskin, he slid in smoothly, and couldn't resist one slow stroke before he paused. "Good place for you?" he asked.

"Shift up," Clint said, his breath catching harshly in his throat. "Get up high, so that your cock is rubbing against my clit when you thrust."

It took a few tries for Bucky to find the right position and angle, but finally Clint gave a heartfelt moan, and Bucky knew that he'd gotten it right. Working hard to not lose contact, he let his hips start to piston slowly. His cock was completely surrounded - the hair on Clint's thighs different from the coarse hair on his cunt. Each thrust drove him higher, and he was already having to exert iron control not to just give in and rut until he came, because Clint deserved to come too, and if he didn't come through this, Bucky didn't know what Clint would allow.

But Clint was moaning steadily, his own hips lifting in counterpoint to Bucky's, and he didn't really think it was going to be that big of a problem. Bucky could feel the area around his cock getting slicker, figured that Clint was getting wet, but didn't have the breath or courage to ask. 

Clint's arms wrapped around Bucky, his fingertips drilling into the back of Bucky's shoulder and neck, and he was gasping. "Little more. Give me a little more, Bucky. Almost, almost, almost..."

That was no problem at all, because Bucky could see his own orgasm, the shape and the size of it, and so he kept pressing in, fucking against Clint's hard, muscular thighs. 

Clint's words seemed to desert him, leaving him making little "ah, ah, ah," sounds, his hands clenching down convulsively, his thighs even tighter, and Bucky forced out the words, "Did you just - "

"Yeah, yeah," Clint murmured. "Go on, Bucky. You're so good, did so good. Go ahead and come, _please_."

It was the "please" that broke Bucky entirely, and he started to thrust hard and fast, trying to get to that orgasm that was... almost... _there_. He pushed down as hard as he could, his cock jerking against the tight grip Clint had with his thighs, and let his orgasm wash through him, shooting between Clint's legs and against his sheets.

When his orgasm was over, he wanted nothing more than to just relax straight down and feel Clint's warmth, but Clint was pushing on his shoulder. "Ick, ick, ick - wet spot. Roll over, Bucky. Come on, _move_."

Bucky obeyed, not only rolling off of Clint but shifting over so that Clint could move out of the wet spot. He couldn't help glancing at it, and yeah, that was a mess. "Next time, towel," he said, trying to make sense and not sure he was.

"Yeah, towel," Clint said. "But you know the advantage of me being trans? I don't have to wait to recover to fuck you. So just let me know when you're ready to go again, and we'll try something different."

Bucky's eyes were closing whether he wanted them to or not. "You gonna fuck me with that toy?" he slurred out.

Clint's voice was amused when he said, "If that's what you want, sure."

Bucky wasn't sure what exactly they had right now, but maybe it was a start on something good. That was what he hoped, anyway. The last thing Bucky remembered was nodding at Clint before he dropped into sleep like he'd been hit over the head.


End file.
